Mother's Day 2018

In the midst of the end-of-school chaos, we get mother's day.  Unfair!  The very time where all mothers are the most frazzled and frantic.  Maybe it is a good time to come down from all the crazy and remember just why we do it all.

These kids.

I love these kids so much!  They all come with their most unique gifts and diverse challenges.  The one thing that is constant with all five of them, however, is that each of them has such a good heart.  They are passionate and talented and it is a joy to watch these big kids grow into the young adults they are becoming.  (I'll keep the little boys, little boys for just awhile more, if you please.)

It is not an easy job...motherhood.  This year has been particularly challenging for me.  (I must say that every year...)  Still, my heart is full.  It is full of happiness and heartache.  I don't think you can have one without the other.  As moms we worry.  We hurt for poor choices our kids make and we hurt for wrongs done to them.  Isn't that a part of love?  It seem like it comes with the territory.  How could we love them fully if we were unaffected  by their life experiences?  We invest our time, our talents, our physical, mental and emotional being into every single day of these kids' lives.  We hold our hopes and dreams for their happiness at the center of our every decision.  What is the best choice for them?  We weigh this heavy question from every angle.  Do they need more guidance or less?  How are they affecting each other?  Does one child's need outweigh another"s.  How will they reach their potential?  How can I give everything and then separate myself from their success and failures?

It's such a complicated game to play and the stakes are ever so precious.

Still.  I'm glad to be in the game.

Each one of these bright lights are worth my every effort to guide them.  They have given me a fullness and depth to my own life...pushing my own talents in ways I never knew possible.  The vey act of sacrifice as a mother is still a selfish thing.  We give and then these individual children give back in more ways that we could have dreamed of.   

I would never give up one snuggle-kiss into my neck from one of my toddlers even if it meant I would never have the stress of chauffeuring the now-teenager a million different places at once.  My quiet, sweet moments outweigh whatever demands on my time and heart the loud, hard moments call for.  

These five kids are my dream and passion.  I'm so proud them. 

Also, I wouldn't never have been able to mother the way that I have without the support and love from this guy.  Robert has always been such a wonderful father and partner.  Raising kids certainly takes a village, but my main strength has always been with my best friend.  I love this guy!

(Ethan took this picture.)

I wish all the Mother in my life a happy and gratifying Mother's day.  Our little moment to shine in the whirlwind of our normal lives.

patiently waiting for Dad to come join us.